I was told to utilize my inner strength and to practice being mindful of my thoughts, emotions, and actions. Take deep breaths when I start to get that high anxiety low tolerance feeling. It's easier said than done but I know I can do it.
Dealing with such intense emotions is something I don't deal with well. My children are the same way and it's why they have so many issues. If I can learn to control my behavior better, then I can take what I've learned to teach them how to handle theirs. Everything for a reason.
I talked with Kieriana this morning before she left for school and explained to her that I was stressed out and that's why I had been yelling so much. At her school they taught her how to use a coping word. When she starts freaking out someone says the word and she relaxes. It sort of snaps her out of it. Her word is "butterflies" and it's really been working. We decided mine will be "monkeys". Whenever I start to get agitated someone can say "monkeys" and it will remind me to get control of myself before I start turning into super bitch.
I can handle this. I've dealt with worse things than this. I can deal with this too.